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How to Have Impossible Conversations

A Very Practical Guide

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How to Have Impossible Conversations

Von: Peter Boghossian, James Lindsay
Gesprochen von: Peter Boghossian
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Über diesen Titel

 From politics and religion to workplace negotiations, ace the high-stakes conversations in your life with this indispensable guide from a persuasion expert.

In our current political climate, it seems impossible to have a reasonable conversation with anyone who has a different opinion. Whether you're online, in a classroom, an office, a town hall—or just hoping to get through a family dinner with a stubborn relative—dialogue shuts down when perspectives clash. Heated debates often lead to insults and shaming, blocking any possibility of productive discourse. Everyone seems to be on a hair trigger.

In How to Have Impossible Conversations, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay guide you through the straightforward, practical, conversational techniques necessary for every successful conversation—whether the issue is climate change, religious faith, gender identity, race, poverty, immigration, or gun control. Boghossian and Lindsay teach the subtle art of instilling doubts and opening minds. They cover everything from learning the fundamentals for good conversations to achieving expert-level techniques to deal with hardliners and extremists. This book is the manual everyone needs to foster a climate of civility, connection, and empathy.

"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, and gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book." —Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God Kommunikation & soziale Kompetenz Persönliche Entwicklung Politik & Regierungen

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Kritikerstimmen

"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book."—Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God
"In a Free Republic there would be no 'impossible conversations', which begs the question: are we truly free anymore? After reading, listening and conversing with Peter and James, I am convinced that they are the Galileo's, I. Kant and even William Tynsdale of our time."—--Glenn Beck
"I thought I knew all I needed to know about conversations and arguments. I was wrong. I just knew a lot about debates and rows. In their insightful and highly readable new book, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay offer all kinds of ingenious pathways to constructive dialogue. At a time when public discourse has degenerated into mud-slinging and when campuses favour every kind of diversity except viewpoint diversity, this is an invaluable contribution. I guarantee that reading it will make you more -- much more -- persuasive."—Niall Ferguson, Milbank Family Senior Fellow, The Hoover Institution, Stanford
"In these polarized times, people live inside social media echo chambers of their own extremism, growing ever more self-righteous. This smart, scientifically grounded book, teeming with social and emotional wisdom, teaches how to break that isolation and effectively converse with someone with very different opinions. It will make you more adept at challenging, even changing, someone's beliefs, biases and sacred values. And it might even pave the way for making some of those changes yourself."—Robert Sapolsky, John A. and Cynthia Fry Gunn Professor of Neurology and of Neurosurgery, Stanford University
"Drs. Boghossian and Lindsay offer critical advice regarding how to talk about contentious issues in today's political climate. How to Have Impossible Conversations is a necessary guide to navigating disagreements -- and building bridges -- using approaches backed by evidence and science."—Debra W. Soh, Ph.D., science columnist and political commentator
"This fascinating book provides not only useful instruction on how to talk with someone who thinks differently, it also offers a powerful method of questioning and reducing confidence in unsubstantiated beliefs to help people think about what is true."—Helen Pluckrose, Editor, Areo Magazine
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At first I had a hard time following since I plug in when I ride my bike but the second time around, giving it time to sink in, I much enjoyed it. Communication is key and knowing how to or not, approach it, will be defining factor to the success or failure.

Communication is key

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This is one of my favourite books, which means a lot. Yes, it is hard to talk to people that are different from you. But it is possible and it is even possible to have a respectful and enjoyable conversation with almost anybody. And it is so important to talk about the problems in the world, what the other person thinks of them and how to solve them. This book is indeed a very practical guide and while I'm not at the expert level yet I tried out some techniques quite successfully while talking to strangers. I sometimes just talk to nice people in the train about environmental problems (among other things) and feel more confident in doing so after reading the book. I feel like I can talk about difficult topics in a respectful but (hopefully) somewhat thought-provoking way. I recommend it to any activist or other human being interested in civil conversation and exploring what we have in common. Thanks for writing this book! (Apparently now it is also available in German)

Great guide also for climate communication

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While the book provides some good tips overall, there were two nits that stopped me from enjoying it more:
1. "Villification of she": the discussion partener one disagrees with is often a "she"... Why not use "they" to make it as generic as possible and not appear as targeting a group in particular?
2. Entitledness: I couldn't help but feel several times during the book that it was written for entitled people who know they are right and do not want to change their opinion.

Good tips overall, but some writing issues

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