At one point in my life in my early 40s, I wondered what it would feel like to be someone different than I used to be.

So for a while I decided to experience what it feels like to be the latest version of me. I know it might sound a little weird. At my age you're supposed to behave like a mature, grown-up, serious woman, but, what do you think? I decided I wanted to live different. Right now you may be thinking, I think she's going through the stage of menopause and all this hormonal stuff, changes in mood, hot flashes, sweating, moments of irritability, etc. But I decided that I wanted to spend it my way, and it doesn't have to be a boring stage or that you feel that your youth is slipping away. On the contrary, thinking that I'm almost half a century old made me question several little things.

I have always been a very philosophical person. In fact the word is that I ask a lot, and if you know me you will know that I do it frequently, but I told myself it is time to take my questions to another level and here I am writing you my book. I don't know what number it is anymore, I don't know if it's 23 or 24 or maybe by the time I finish it will be 30, but I wanted to give myself the opportunity to write it while I'm experiencing what I want to do. I invite you to be my special guest. Right now I am here alone listening to Christmas music, in a very cozy place while everyone enjoys a delicious coffee.

The day is cold, it is exactly December 9, 2021 and here I am, enjoying music while I self-inquire about my life. I don't know if it's rebellion, I consider that even in the little details. It is time for me to question what I want. And that's right, I decide to self-inquire why I do things and what I did often. This really is one of those books where I have decided what else to find in myself! and there we go. Will you go with me?

It will be a pleasure for me. I promise that you will be always my confidant.

I introduce myself. My name is.... The truth is that I also changed it a while ago.

I was born calling myself Leticia Jiménez Angel and yes, at one point in my life I decided to change it, by doing it according to literal Pythagorean numerology. What I did was change all the energy charge that my birth name brought, meanwhile I tell you that it has gone very well with this name, literally. At this moment in my life I feel really happy, and identified with what I do and it is precisely at this stage that I began to write with a lot of passion, so let me introduce myself, my current name is: Letty Lopez, nice to meet you.

Today is December 24, 2021, you know life had a super sad event for me. On December 13, my dear Lalito, my beautiful little nephew who was only 24 years old, lost his life and today Christmas Eve we buried him. All this left me without words. I don't know how to explain what I feel, my chest hurts while I write to you, seeing his body as if asleep, but lifeless made me question my life, made me ask myself more questions, because life is gone in a second.

I was not prepared to say goodbye to a 24-year-old man, full of illusions and dreams to fulfill.

Without a doubt God needed it, his time had come. Now I understand that not even death, even if you take it away, when it touches you, it touches you.

The truth is that all this is so painful that it made me reevaluate my life. His noble and happy life helped me to see mine to ask myself: Letty, do you really do what you like? Letty, are you happy? Letty, are you ready to die in the body physically?

And so many more questions asking me if what I do makes me happy.

I feel very blessed. I have three daughters and a husband. I recognize that I must value them even more.